Best friends have always been the people who stand by us, know all our secrets, and share in our biggest laughs and deepest moments. In the ’90s, BFFs were basically family. They were the ones you called on your corded landline late at night, swapped secrets with during lunch at school, and coordinated outfits with whenever you went to the mall. While the core of friendship hasn’t really changed, the ways we experience and express those relationships definitely have. Let’s take a fun look at how BFF dynamics have shifted from the ’90s to today—because even though times are different, some things stay the same.
In the ’90s, fights with your best friend usually started over the simplest things. Maybe you forgot to take care of her Tamagotchi while she was away, or you borrowed her favorite CD and took way too long to give it back. Those little arguments seemed huge at the time, but more often than not, they were short-lived and easily forgiven. Nowadays, adult BFF fights are a little less obvious and way more passive-aggressive. Instead of yelling at each other face-to-face, the cold shoulder comes via ignored texts or a lack of engagement on Instagram stories. Passive-aggressive comments and social media silence have taken the place of slammed lockers and eye rolls, but the silent treatment still works like a charm.
When it came to making up after a fight in the ’90s, it was all about slipping your friend a handwritten apology note during class, complete with sad face doodles and “LYLAS” (Love You Like a Sister) scrawled at the bottom. Those notes were like peace treaties back then. These days, apologies come in the form of an overpriced Starbucks latte and a smiling selfie posted for all your mutuals to see. The likes start rolling in, and boom, everyone knows you’re back to being besties. The method has changed, but the relief of making up with your BFF feels just as good.
Friday nights in the ’90s were all about trips to the mall. You’d hit Claire’s for glittery accessories, split a soft pretzel from Auntie Anne’s, and maybe sneak into an R-rated movie if you were feeling rebellious. The mall was your playground. These days, going out is totally overrated. Now, you and your BFF are all about staying in, ordering takeout, pouring a couple of glasses of wine, and binge-watching Netflix in your pajamas. Whether you’re walking the mall or chilling on the couch, Friday nights with your best friend are still the best nights.
In terms of playing wingwoman, the ’90s had us relying on cootie catchers (those folded paper fortune tellers) to decide who our crush was. Your BFF would orchestrate a “random” locker run-in and make sure other girls stayed far away. Today’s BFFs are like digital detectives. Give them a first name and a vague clue, and they’ll track down your crush’s entire social media presence in under an hour. Whether it’s playground scheming or internet sleuthing, a best friend always has your back in the romance department.
Back then, squad goals meant assembling a group of friends where each one represented a different Spice Girl. You couldn’t just hang out—you had to have the ultimate crew. These days, it’s not about having a huge group. Just one solid BFF is enough to pull off a “Single Ladies” dance routine, even if you’re wearing sweatpants instead of sequins. Big group or dynamic duo, the squad is all about the strength of that best friend bond.
Gossip sessions in the ’90s focused on who was wearing the same scrunchie as you, who borrowed your slap bracelet without asking, or who got the last Warhead in the lunchroom. Today’s gossip revolves around reality show spoilers, Instagram drama, and decoding cryptic tweets. But whether it’s the latest cafeteria scandal or a celebrity breakup, sharing the tea with your BFF has always been the ultimate bonding time.
When dealing with heartbreak, ’90s besties knew the power of snacks. Your friend would bring you an extra Cosmic Brownie or pack of Dunkaroos, and suddenly life didn’t seem so bad. These days, the heartbreak cure involves yoga classes, $5 bottles of wine, and a girls’ night out. If anyone tries to hit on you before you’re ready, your BFF is there with a quick “She’s not interested.” Whether it’s snacks or self-care, best friends are still the best healers after a breakup.
Staying in touch used to mean ringing your friend’s doorbell or calling their house phone, hoping their parents didn’t answer. You might even write letters if you didn’t see each other often. Now, you’re in constant contact through texts, voice memos, TikToks, and DMs. One tap and you’re laughing about the same thing no matter where you are.
Getting into trouble together was different too. In the ’90s, it was all about Ding Dong Ditch, toilet-papering someone’s house, or making prank calls. Today, it’s sneaking out of work for a long lunch or sending each other memes during a boring Zoom meeting. Mischief may look different, but BFFs still love pushing boundaries together.
Defending each other has changed too. On the playground, you’d yell at the bully or run for backup. Now, your BFF posts a flawless selfie of the two of you online, making it clear you’re living your best life without any haters. Whether it’s real-life drama or virtual shade, best friends are always ready to stand up for each other.
And showing off the bond? In the ’90s, friendship bracelets were everything. You’d spend hours making sure the colors were just right. Today, it’s matching tattoos, quirky Instagram bios, or listing each other as “in a relationship” on Facebook for fun. Whether it’s woven threads or permanent ink, showing off your BFF pride is a tradition that never fades.
At the end of the day, whether we’re talking Tamagotchis and mall trips or TikTok dances and Starbucks runs, the love between best friends is constant. Time moves on, but true friendship? That lasts forever.
